POSTAL BULLETS: News from the postal underworld Welcome to the Apocalypse... AGAIN! In the upcoming Single-Player expansion: Apocalypse Weekend (Low-Carb Edition), Players will pick up the twisted saga of the Postal Dude as he awakens in a hospital room, having apparently survived the self-inflicted gunshot wound that ended POSTAL 2 with a... sorry, I just can't bring myself to say it. But you know what I mean... If he manages to escape the insanity of the killer cat-infested Hospital and the recurring hallucinogenic effects of his head injury (not the Garys, anything but the Garys!), a whole new, previously-unseen area of Paradise will open before him. But now, the once placid streets of Paradise are plagued with MadCow-infected Tourettes Zombies, easily offended, self righteous and heavily armed Protestor zealots and, of course, foreign Terrorist lunatics! And wouldn't you know, there's not a cop to be found anywhere. Armed with hilariously dangerous new weapons such as the Sledgehammer and the soon-to-be-legendary Boomerang Machete, the Dude must hack and blast his way through the Apocalyptic onslaught while trying to rescue Champ from the pound and help Vince with some marketing (because Mike J caught the MadCow, but that's another subplot). Just when you think you've seen everything, more than 20 new maps will lead the Dude through a brand-new bloody swath, including the Terrorist Training Camp, the Military Base, the Municipal Elephant Preserve and even Vince's House! You are SO not ready. But don't take OUR word for it, check out the eye-gouging trailers and see for yourselves! Ready? GO! Apocalypse Weekend Trailers The European launch of POSTAL 2 which we promised in a previous issue is now in the process of happening. Ironically, we find ourselves landing on European shores exactly 60 years from the day Allied Forces stormed the beaches of Normandy. Lafayette, we are here! The long-awaited 1409 Patch is Now Available! Additions and Improvements include: An awesome new "Red Light" map for SNATCH games! (You're welcome.); Explosive and splash damage now follows same friendly fire rules as everything else. At 0% friendly fire nothing hurts teammates, and at 100% teammates are hurt the same as enemies; Credit awarded for kill if you blow up grenades or rockets by shooting them; Kicking ricocheting scissors flying through the air will award you the kill if they hit anyone, and they will no longer hurt you once you kick them. Other Improvements: TeamSay messages are now green with (Team) right after your name. This is only fully supported if the person sending you the message also has this patch (or later); Added customizable "Say" and "TeamSay" messages to facilitate communicate in the heat of battle. You can have up to 8 "Say" and 8 "TeamSay" messages. By default the "TeamSay" messages are bound to keys F2 through F8 and F12, while "Say" messages are not bound to any keys. You can change the key bindings via Options -> Controls -> Misc. and then pick "Pre-set Say Controls" or "Pre-set TeamSay Controls". You can change default messages by opening the console (press ~ by default) and typing: "SetTeamSay 1 Head to their base!" This command breaks down like this: "SetTeamSay" is the command, "1" is the message number (from 1 to 8) and "Head to their base!" is the message. Thereafter when you press F2 during the game, the "Head to their base!" message will be sent to all your teammates. Say messages work the same way but use the SetSay command instead. Remember, "Say" messages aren't bound to any keys by default. The 1409 Patch also adds customizable "empty messages" that are sent whenever you use "Say" or "TeamSay" without typing a message. By default these are empty so using "Say" or "TeamSay" without a message will not send anything. You can set the empty message from the console (press ~ by default) and type: "SetEmptySay blahblahblah" which breaks down like this: "SetEmptySay" is the command and "blahblahblah" is the message you want to send. After that, whenever you use " Say " without typing anything, it will automatically send "blahblahblah". TeamSay works the same way using the SetEmptyTeamSay command. Finally, the default irc channel has been changed from 'irc.gamesnet.net' to 'irc.gamesurge.net'. The patch also offers several fixes, including the one where projectors could not be turned on/off on the Performance menu. In addition, the "Health Pipe Cheat" and the "Can't drop weapons" bug (which only occurred on servers that had the "Health Pipe" hotfix installed) have been taken care of. Get the 1409 Patch here Thursday the 27th The John Miller Program will have the one and only Vince Desi via phone from New York.This will be his 4th time on the program and each time he brings his wacky sense of humor with him. He will be talking about the Weekend pack and what is coming next from the folks of POSTAL. Listen in Live Thursday, May 27th at 6pm EST. Listen to the show here!

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